early morning update september 27 2008

It's been a hard week for me in a lot of ways. I had a horrid bout of constipation followed by an even more horrid bout of diarrhea. This put me out of commission for around 2 days. I am on so many medications; medications to move my bowels, medications to stop me from moving my bowels. Anti-anxiety medications, anti-depressants. Pain killers. Sleep aids. Standostatin. My body doesn't know which way is up. I had a very restless, dream filled night, which is why I am writing this update at 5 am on a Saturday. Add the ongoing stress of chemo and just plain living with cancer and both my body and mind are hanging on by the skin of their teeth. I need a break. I don't expect I'll get one though...